I turned forty this past Sunday. While I did not become a Jedi master right away or anything super cool like that I have noticed a change in how I perceive being forty.
It’s a subtle change but it is there. Kind of like The Force.
Yes I think being forty is like having my own personal Yoda.
When I was younger I think I had an idea of what being forty would be like. Now that I am here I know it’s not what I thought at all.
To me forty is so many different things.
It is being more confident.
It is realizing like I did on Saturday, that I have had some friends for over twenty years! Some even longer. That is gold to me.
It’s knowing that while the old friends are gold, the new friends I’ve made are also part of the treasure and they all enrich my life.
It’s loving that I am coming into my own.
It’s learning to let go of the people that don’t want to be in my life and being so grateful for the people who are.
It’s feeling sexy.
It’s saying goodbye to the childbearing years and really being okay with that.
It’s enjoying my four children and looking forward to seeing them grow into amazing people.
It’s traveling more and seeing the world.
It’s still being in love with the man I married and discovering that after all these years and kids, there is still fireworks.
It’s laughing more.
It’s accepting myself and my little quirks and being okay with some people not liking that about me.
It’s making connections and making new friends.
It’s being okay with being alone.
It’s setting more goals and challenging myself to attain them.
It’s being humble and vulnerable.
It’s finally learning to say I’m sorry when I should.
It’s taking the time for me and not feeling guilty about it. Learning that even though I am a wife and busy mom I don’t have to come last.
It’s getting fit and healthy and not settling for less than what I deserve to give myself.
It’s setting sail and looking forward to where the wind takes me.
It’s spending quality time with the people I love over savory dinners and delicious wines.
It’s making more martini’s and shaking what my mama gave me.
It’s coming home from a long journey only to discover what I was looking for was always here in the mirror.
It’s learning that though I may never forget, it is worth it to forgive.
It’s knowing really and truly not to sweat the small stuff.
It’s seizing the day and really doing all the things I’ve always wanted to do.
It’s knowing that I have so much more to look forward to and this milestone is just the beginning.
It’s really loving myself and my body as I am this very minute.
It’s looking at the laugh lines in the mirror and loving how they got there.
It’s seeing strands of white in my hair and loving that I on my way to being a wise woman, wise enough to color my hair should I want to.
It’s a hum of contentment with how things are and how they will be.
It’s realizing this force has been there all along, I just wasn’t ready to tap into it.
It’s loving my life and where I am in it. Even more at forty.