It’s been six years. Six years of missing you. The void you left will never be filled. It wasn’t always easy. Far from an ideal childhood.
Yet I had the choice and the chance to change the outcome.
In these past six years I’ve grown. My children, your grandchildren have grown. How you would love to see them now. I am so happy I gave you the chance to get to know them.
Things could have been so different.
There were no tears today. I think it was the first time. Yet I missed you. Today there were smiles and laughs. There were hugs and kisses.
Like every day.
Life moves forward even when we want to keep it still.
I celebrate you. Your life. It’s so important to me to turn my sorrow to joy. It gets easier as the years pass. I don’t have to cry. I can remember you and smile
I can sleep now and dream of you in happier times.
Not hospital times.
I can remember your smiling eyes. Your Irish eyes. Not dying eyes.
In between the best of times and the worst of times, there were better times. There were loving times.
Each year has painted a coat upon me, a coat of armour to strengthen me. Each year envelopes me in love & laughter.
Each year reminds me to live. To really breathe in this life.
To strive to see the beauty even when the world seems so ugly.
Every day I love you.
Each year I miss you.
I will always miss you,